There are five things that you must say to your child at bedtime every night. They will make your bond stronger and help in building a great relationship with your kid. I love bedtime!! It gives me time for myself after kids have slept and also it’s the best time to talk and bond with kids. We all feel like unwinding after a long day at work and so do kids. They also have long hours at school and do other outdoor activities.
Bedtime is the perfect time for talking to the kids about their school, friends, games, activities and everything their lives revolve around. It’s quite and silent. None of you is in a hurry for anything. Kids also love the closeness, the cuddling and the talk. It is also the time when you can bond with your kids, express your love, instill values and confidence.
There is no right age to do the bedtime talk. Your child is all ears to you from the day he is born. The more you talk, the more you grow closer. If your baby is very small, you can have a conversation with him even while you are feeding him.
You can download bedtime stories from here
1. I Love You
I say I love you to my children first thing in the morning and the last thing at night. I say it atleast 50 times in a day. We all know how good it feels when we say it and when kids hear it. It just emphasises the fact that they are loved always. It also makes them expressive about their feelings and emotions.
It’s like exchanging huge amounts of endorphin all day everyday
2. Ask them about their day
“How was your day at school, D?” “It was good, mumma! We had a dance class today and we danced on Cheap Thrills.” This is just an example of how I start the conversation with Miss D to know about her day at school and what all did she do. At night when I ask this again, the answer changes. The conversation gets shifted to her activities, friends and playground games. It’s important to know what your child is thinking, is there something or someone bothering her, is there something he/she likes to share but is scared or hesitates.
Just open the conversation
3. I am so proud of you
“You know what, I am so proud of you because you are very confident and always share everything with mumma and papa.” Every child likes if his/her efforts are recognised, however small it may be. If your child is an introvert, then, getting him to share his feelings and emotions is challenging but you know the joy when your child opens up with you.
So, tell your child how proud you are!
4. Highlight two good things your kid did that day
Appreciating good behaviour of your kids goes a long way in building good character. “I saw you helping Ahaan today. That was so nice of you.” “I saw you shared your water bottle with your friends. I am so happy you did.” “I really liked the way you spoke to the aunty today. I am so proud of you.” “I feel so happy when you help mumma and papa. You’re a good baby.” These are examples of you can say to your child.
Appreciating and talking to your child during bedtime about his achievements just makes it extra special because it's just you two talking
5. Subtly talk about one thing your child should not have done or could have done better that day
Pick that one thing or behaviour that you thought your kid should not have done or could have done better. Talking subtly about a misbehaviour by your child will help him in understanding the difference between good and bad behaviour. However, don’t be direct, or start blaming your child. This will only stop him talking about it further and it’ll make him scared of you. It’s easy to talk during the night because your child is also in that frame of mind when he/she is ready to actually listen to you. Talking about it at bedtime will have a positive impact on your kid.
Your child will understand that you are not punishing him but just telling him to not do it again or try again to do better
If your child hesitates in sharing or talking to you then you have to make changes. Remember that it all starts with you opening up with your child. Talking about your day or how you felt about something shows the kids how easily and comfortably they can share things with you as their parent and also as a friend.
Is there something you would like to add to this? Leave a comment below and share with me.
I am from Team number 5 – Roaring Tigresses. Keep coming back, as me and my team will be writing on a wide spectrum of subjects throughout the month of June. Introducing my other team members:
Riddhi Jhala www.ritzyglitzy.in/